How to co-parent after divorce

Finishing a divorce can feel like a major weight has come off your shoulders. Weeks or months of negotiation, document collection, and court dates have finally finished, and you can begin to move into the next chapter of your life. There are differences after a divorce that a new divorcee will need to adjust to, including how to work together with their ex to raise their children.

Putting the needs of your children first is easier said than done in a divorce. There is a list of factors that can predict how well ex-spouses will work together after a divorce, but regardless of circumstances, here are three things that a parent can do to promote co-parenting after divorce:

Promote communication

Regardless of how difficult it may be, communication between parents is essential for the well-being of a child. Discussing matters like how medical appointments went, what schoolwork needs attention, and maintaining regularity between each parent are necessary discussions parents need to have. Avoiding these and other discussions can lead to an environment where children get away with bad habits and behavior.

Work together

Children want to see their parents cooperate, and it can be harmful to them to see a parent refuse to be around the other. Make a point to go to your child’s events that your ex-spouse attends, work together on planning supervision of the child’s schoolwork, and be open to assisting your ex-spouse if they need to reschedule a visitation appointment.

Do not leverage visitation and transportation

It can feel tempting to fight about when visitation should occur or who will pick up or drop the children off, but is it really what is best for your kids? When you fight about these things, your kids can feel like a burden to you. Avoid these arguments and keep them from feeling like they are causing problems by wanting to see both of their parents.

Coparenting is key

When parents work together after a divorce, it reduces their children’s negative consequences, making the parenting experience easier for everyone. Do not be hesitant in doing your part to help yourself and your children adapt to your new way of living.

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